Some Thoughts on Online Dating

online dating

I have never gone online dating before. I did try pen pal writing when I was ten years old, but that was because it was part of our Social Studies class. You know, the UNESCO and all. When texting came to be, I refused to engage in random texting just to see who gets the text message and if someone would actually reply. Besides wasting good money, it’s wasting time, energy and really good brain cells.

Then came online dating. The mere idea was totally repulsive to me. It’s a big NO NO. That is the realm of pretenders and people of questionable repute.

But hey,I know people who found friends and love online. Some even got married.

One of my friends married someone she met online. She told me that she sort of waited after registering and there was one who persisted in writing. Theirs resulted in an exchange of I do’s. My friend is very pretty and very young. Their union is a May- December one. You already get who’s the December part. I wish she made her quest a little more fun by actively looking for The One , instead of waiting. I think she might have met a June partner if she shopped and if she took her time.

To get started, I consulted my good friend Google. He spewed numerous choices which included a brief description and a comparison of each site. The various sites opened my eyes to other worlds, for straights, for non straights, for beautiful people, where you can join for free and later upgrade by becoming a member.

It took a very very long time to complete my profile. I thought I was already applying for a job, a writing one. The psychological profiling resulted to a “book” of myself. Pretty comprehensive and could be upgraded to be more in depth. Then when my profile was about 75 or so percent complete, I got matches. I would be able to view their photos if I upgraded.

I found all the questions tedious. And the thought of revealing to the market my personality so someone who is shopping can take his pick wasn’t very appealing. But I wanted to try an experiment. So of course I didn’t just create any profile. In a way, it was like applying for a job and putting all my best qualifications forward. I had fun answering the basic questions. They made me look within and see what I liked in myself and what I liked to do or to have.

Reading through the matches’ profiles is fun. I didn’t realize the opposite sex who go into it are serious in finding their One True Love and I found one who admitted being nervous about online dating. I guess we all have our doubts and fears.

We just need to keep our heads on our shoulders, just like we do when on real life dating. Make sure you find the right site. Have fun in creating your profile. This is a venue to meet people. The idea is not to get married right away, or it may not even be about getting married. We need to remember that when we meet people whether face to face or online, it is not because we want to get married. It is about connecting with others. Getting to know people. Enlarging your world. Enriching your experiences. Having fun. Helping people. Sharing ideas.

Each person has an objective of course. But if you want to meet THE ONE, then you need to make sure you meet many and not only one. Don’t just make your profile and stay there forever waiting for your prince or your princess to accidentally walk by and find you. It is more like finding that dress that will make you look your best. Or finding your dream job. The quest for your One True Love is going to require work on your part. No stork will drop it on your lap. But hey, remember to have FUN.

Be aware also of “robots” online or of the miscreants. I have to say, this is similar to finding online jobs. There’s a lot of scammers out there. Bear in mind the Dos and Don’ts in making friends.┬áMind your manners especially when connecting with strangers.



Let Us Hope Again


This is not a movie review. I don’t do movie reviews although I do watch movies a lot. I will admit also of my huge crush on Hugh Jackman. Only when he is in X-Men movies. All of us in my family are the best fans of comic book heroes since our childhood. Except my older sister. I am not really sure if she ever read our comic books back then. But this blog is about the message I got from the movie. I don’t know about other movie-goers but I was struck by what the older Professor X said to his younger self: It is time to learn to Hope Again. Both Professors at different points in time were at odds with life: the older one was facing a seemingly insurmountable nemesis bent on killing mutants to the last generation, the Professor still believed the mutants could survive while the younger Professor exchanged his powers for the ability to walk and be like the human species and closed down the school for the “gifted”.

It must be creepy to “meet” your older self who will tell you that you will overcome your obstacles, that you will succeed. That it is possible to believe again. That things will turn out okay.

The mutants in the movie had nowhere to go. The sentinels have been created with the best mutation ability to mimic its opponent and to to use the powers it has taken to defeat the mutant. This movie was the quantum leap result of the X-Men wherein Striker ordered the killing of mutants and the harvesting of their powers to be incorporated in one frankenstein mutant (played by Ryan Reynolds). In a way, since the power to copy was taken from Mystique, then the sentinels were duplicates of Mystique but more powerful.

When faced with such opponents programmed to relentlessly seek and destroy Mutants, even prior to conception, the human race and the mutants were helplessly being exterminated. Hopefully, the leaders of the Mutants, Professor X and Magneto have joined forces and Kitty has fully developed her powers so that she could tamper with time and buy them more of the same. We in real life can’t have more than the 24 hours that we have daily. We have different struggles. Some are practically racing against time, having been told of their poor health conditions, or of deadlines for payments of bills otherwise they will be evicted from their homes, or other conditions that aren’t normally heard of whether in Third World or in First World countries. Sometimes when we have our backs against the wall, we may feel like the same situation in the movie– just waiting for the sentinel to engulf us in flames, or be so hopeless that we’d drown all pain with the use of drugs or any other forms of excuse. But then, even in such dire situations, I want to believe that life has a way of balancing it out. I believe that there is that spark in everyone of us waiting to be reignited. There will be someone or something that can make us see again, learn to hope again. And we will prevail.